The Furious Rose
by Sacred Dust
Summary: A side of Mimi that no one ever sees, written at dawn in secret...set during Season One.
1. It's Nothing

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a story about Mimi from Digimon Season 1—not Mimi as we usually think about her, but a side of her that may have existed. I always saw a little something missing in her character, an empty space…so I'm filling it with my own imagination. I don't own Digimon or anything like that. No money is being made from this, just ask my empty wallet._

_Oh yeah, and this is my first submission in four years. To everyone who ever fav'd or stuck a tag on me, thanks a million. Now I finally have something else for you. Enjoy!_

Ω

THE FURIOUS ROSE, by Sacred Dust

CHAPTER ONE: It's Nothing

Ω

She never let anyone read what she wrote.

One reason was time. When you were one of seven kids chosen to save a world, you didn't get many chances to sit down and show each other stories, poems or random musings. But most of all, it was fear. What if what she wrote was boring, or it didn't make any sense to them? Or if they said it was nice, but believed she was just an airhead pretending to have deep thoughts?

_But I'm not that way, _she scribbled on a new page. _That's not who I am._

Dawn was rising on the Digital World, the rocky horizon slowly erupting in shades of yellow and orange. As the light spread over the sky, red ink spread over the page like a fever. Mimi knew her time was short. Any minute now her friends would be waking up, and then it would be time to worry about the day.

_Tai is always the first to get up. Maybe that's why he's kind of the leader, he's ready to go before anyone else. Sora says he wasn't like that back home, though. And he doesn't know that I'm awake even before him…_

Mimi eyed the wild-haired goggle boy cautiously as he started to move, and her hand froze around the pen. But he was just rolling over in his sleep. The floor of a cave wasn't the most comfortable place to spend the night. She planned to complain about this when they were up—even if she didn't really care at this point, it was expected of her.

Expected. Her normally cheery expression turned sour as the scrawl continued. A surge of red ink, fast and angry as the blood rushing to her face.

_That's what matters. Not what I think. Oh Mimi honey, please don't bother the guests with your writing anymore. They don't understand it. Or put the pen down and get ready sweetheart, we're going to be late. Or Mimi you're so pretty, come out and show it, don't hide in your room with your notebooks. Or at night when they thought I was sleeping—why does she do that? I was never like that. It's probably just a phase. Just take her out shopping for that new dress you saw, she'll love it…_

Her parents never understood. They didn't even want her to bring her notebook to summer camp, she had to sneak it into the bag…well, her third bag. She'd folded it into a beach towel. And that last day when the snow started to fall, she was lucky enough to have it tucked under the belt of her dress before they were whisked off. Some kids were coming inside her cabin and there was no other place to hide it.

She was just going to run outside a moment, do her thing—"wow, I wish I brought my fluffy pink snow boots!"—then get back in and _finish_. But somehow she never got to finish. There was always just one more thing to write and then someone would come along. Or a huge wave would come along and sweep her into another dimension, and…

_At least I met Palmon, _she wrote. _And she's the best friend I've ever had! Maybe she would get it even though she's not human. Or maybe that's a good thing. Maybe I can show her sometime. But I said that last week! Why can't I tell anybody? _

She hadn't tried in years. She remembered the last time—showing a book report to her mother, or it was supposed to be one. But somewhere the book had been left behind and it turned into a Mimi report. Mom didn't seem to like it. "Sweetie, you don't have to try to impress the teachers! Just do the assignment the way they want you to. Then you can relax and read something fun instead." And she handed her one of her fashion magazines. Mimi could have torn it to pieces.

So it all stayed hidden. Even now, in another place with kids she should be able to trust. Well, she did trust them, but…the fear was still there. Several days ago she had rushed ahead of everyone else into that village of Pagumon—which should have been a village of Koromon, but she didn't know that. She was desperate to get cleaned up and find someplace to write. Of course, Tai and Izzy had to run in there like total idiots while she was in the bath.

They could have seen her naked. Or they could have seen her notebook lying open, just a little behind the tub. Which one would be worse? Or was there any difference at all? But neither had happened, so she could forgive them.

_That's the part that's really scary. I don't know if I could forgive someone for seeing this. That sounds so weird but—_

"Too soon," someone mumbled. She gasped and looked up. But it was only Joe, talking in his sleep near the back of the cave. "Too soon…to go in the water…"

She smirked. Now Joe, he definitely wouldn't understand it. But he wouldn't make fun of her, either. Not like the other kids, when she was eight. She showed it to another girl she trusted. The girl showed her friends and they laughed and laughed, so loud she could still hear them sometimes.

It was morning. A rude awakening, like every other morning when she got up early to do this.

_If I tell someone, will they even care? _She protested in red. _My parents didn't, the kids in third grade didn't care. But I care what they think because I wear pink and talk about silly stuff just like they want. Gennai sent me the Crest of Sincerity. Sincere means telling the truth. But I'm afraid that if I do_

The words began to falter.

_Running out of ink. Don't have another pen. Maybe ask Sora? But that means I have to show her t t t_

It was dry.

Mimi held it like she'd lost a friend. After a long moment, she blinked back tears and closed the notebook. It had a pretty pink rose on the cover.

She slipped it back into her bag as she heard some of the kids and Digimon stirring. Tai pushed himself up on his elbows, groaning from his uncomfortable sleep. "Man, my back…we'd better take out Etemon today, guys. I'm sure not spending another night in _here_. Guys…? Hey, wake up already."

"Say, Mimi…" someone else said in a scratchy voice. Mimi wiped her eyes hurriedly and turned to smile at her. "Morning, Palmon."

"What was that you were putting in your bag?" The plantlike Digimon studied her with those deep green eyes, and in that moment Mimi wanted to tell her everything. It wasn't the time, they had to get going. But at least she could say "I'll show you" or "kind of a diary" or "don't tell anyone, but" or even "I'll tell you later"…or _something_, one side of her begged the other in silence. Say anything.

But she hesitated long enough for the fear and the fury to creep up on her, to swallow her words into empty space. "…Oh, it was nothing."

In the back of her mind, she heard laughter.

Ω

Ω

_It's been forever since I wrote anything. Be gentle?_

_-Sacred Dust_


	2. Just Deserts

CHAPTER TWO: Just Deserts

Ω

_What is it about writing? There are lots of other things I like and no one has a problem with them. Fashion, singing, drinking soda and watching TV. But it's like I can't talk about anything important, except in here. I know the others notice. But they don't ask me why._

_They talk about me sometimes though. There she goes again. Do you think Mimi hears the same things we hear? I'm honestly not sure anymore. Well, Joe and Matt, I heard you talking about me! Does that count? But I don't blame people for thinking that._

Mimi was back in business. She borrowed a new pen from Sora a few days ago, although she had to fib about it. "Heyyy, you know what this trip is missing? A cuteness list! I'll write down all the Digimon we meet and rate them on a cuteness scale." Sora thought it sounded so funny that she had to see it later, so Mimi had to actually do it…

…But it gave her an excuse to write around everyone! And none of them ever looked! Especially not the boys. She had never felt so free—or so vulnerable. But what was it that olden-time American guy once said about freedom and security? Well, something.

At the moment she was sitting in the desert by a pyramid—the Digiworld version anyway—while the others tried to assess the situation. Etemon was finally defeated, never to pollute the realm with his awful singing again. It should have been a time to celebrate except that Tai and Agumon (Metalgreymon as they last saw him) had vanished. If that was the price of rubbing out an egotistical monkey, Mimi thought, it was a poor trade.

_Just bring Tai back already, it's not funny anymore! The old floating weirdo better do something about this. But I don't know what we're going to do until then. Matt will want to move on without him, but I bet Sora and T.K. won't. Izzy will try to email him or something like that. Joe won't know what to do. But neither do I, I'm just writing because it's better than freaking out._

_And while I'm thinking about it…Etemon and his new body? Zero on the cute scale. Minus zero. _

So if she were caught in a space-time anomaly with a giant yellow dinosaur, where would she go? That one drew a blank. Where would she _want_ to go? "Home," she muttered. It wasn't perfect, but she missed it all the same. Well, if Tai was home now, his parents were in for a shock.

Two of her friends were arguing about something. Mimi's eyebrow twitched in irritation.

_Yep, Sora and Matt are at it already. It's weird how it is with them. Tai and Sora will argue all day long, but they're still "two peas in a pod" like my grandma would say…and Matt's a different vegetable. Sora won't let him just take over if Tai is gone._

_I don't think I would like that either. Can't we all just sit down and talk about this? Look at us, we're already falling apart like fake designer clothes._

"Look at us…?" Who was she supposed to be writing to? Oh, well…

"Mimi…" a voice growled. She jumped. Matt was standing about five feet away, red-faced from frustration. "You're writing your stupid list _now?_ At a time like this? Give me that thing!" He reached down to snatch away the notebook.

"_No!" _Mimi's blood boiled. She wrenched it away from him and held it close, scrambling back on her heels. Her hat fell off and rolled somewhere, unnoticed.

Matt stood there open-mouthed. He'd never seen her like this. Amber eyes narrowed, gloves clenched into fists—she looked ready to _fight _him.

"It's none of your business, Matt," she cried. "So you…you just leave me alone!"

His own anger had given way to shock. He held up his hands and spoke gently. "Hey, what's wrong with you? Look, I think you should just put the notebook down for a while and talk to us. Maybe if—"

"Is that a fact? Well, you're not in charge here. Stop trying to be Tai!"

Matt turned away from her as if he'd been struck. He stood still for the longest moment, breathing hard, and then stomped off through the sand.

Mimi stared after him defiantly. She had hurt him, and meant to. Sora, Joe and Gomamon were close enough to see the argument. Joe and his partner were speechless for once; Sora offered a weak "that wasn't nice, Mimi." She ignored them all and walked off a few paces, before they could see her guilt setting in.

Ω

She stood and watched the sun for a while as it faded to the west. She wished she were going with it. They both could hide their faces from the world, and not come back until the time was right…

"Mimi?" a familiar squeaky, scratchy voice came from behind her. She turned and looked at Palmon, unable to force a smile this time. The Digimon stretched her vine-fingers to hold out Mimi's lost hat. She took it with a weary nod of thanks. "Are you okay now?"

"Think so," Mimi shrugged. "Matt was being icky, Tai picked a bad time for a vacation…I guess I kinda freaked out back there."

"It wasn't just Matt and Tai, though." So she had seen it, too.

"Nope." Mimi turned back to the horizon, shifting her bag to the other shoulder. Palmon's eyes followed it briefly and came back to her.

"Mimi, I'm your friend. Don't you trust me?"

_It's not you,_ Mimi thought but couldn't say. _I can't trust anyone. Don't bother them with your problems. Blind them with pink. Make them deaf with girl talk. Kill them with kindness. And never let them in._

So far she never had. But if she shut out her best friend now…things might never be the same. Mimi took a deep breath and looked up. "I…"

Palmon was walking away.

Fear ran like ice through her veins. "Wait! Palmon…" Her partner turned. "I'm sorry! Listen. I…I'll let you…carry the bag for a while."

It was no revelation, but it was the best she could do right now—to trust her _around_ the notebook. Behind Mimi's eyes, her parents gave her strange looks and the third-grade girls pointed and laughed. She ignored it all.

The Digimon seemed to understand her. "Good. You're too hard on yourself with that thing." Her meaning was also clear. Mimi offered the bag; her vines snaked out to accept it.

A moment later, the desert came apart. The ground rumbled and fractured as entire drifts were jolted loose. Mimi lost her grip on the bag, and it hung weightless in the air for a moment before plummeting into a crack. Palmon's vines snatched it up at the last second, but she didn't see the sand exploding beneath her partner's feet.

"Don't move!" Biyomon swooped down and carried Mimi to safer ground. In a moment of courage, Joe lifted a frightened T.K. onto his shoulders and waded waist-deep through sand to Matt and Gabumon.

As Sora slipped down a crumbling dune towards another fissure, Mimi rushed after her and grabbed her arm. "Hang on, Sora! We've got you!"

The flying Digimon took over, and soon everyone was safe at the edge of the desert.

A breathless Matt turned to make sure everyone was all right. "Now what's happening? Did Etemon do this too?"

"Sorry, Matt, it was me," Mimi joked. "My hissy fits cause earthquakes."

Ω

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_That seemed like a good place to end this chapter…hope you guys like it so far!_

_-Sacred Dust_


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